LHC to search for elusive particles. maybe it can find Greg too?

Tomorrow, the Large Hadron Collider will be turned on at CERN for the first time. It has spent the past few weeks being cooled to liquid helium temperatures. Soon, beams of protons will start to be accelerated to speeds only fractionally less than the speed of light.
Some worry that the LHC will create black holes or strangelet goo that will destroy the Earth, however they are either stupid, don't know what they're talking about or lying.
The LHC should allow us to hunt for the elusive Higgs boson, the so-called "god particle" that may be responsible for the phenomenon of mass.
We here at Greg-watch are used to searching for elusive things, so perhaps we could collaborate with the scientists at CERN and together, in the spirit of international cooperation, we can figure just exactly where he is?